


Don't Call Me Daughter, Not Fit To, The Picture Kept Will Remind Me

by Velocity_Owl87



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, BAMF Stiles Stilinski, Control Issues, Dubious Morality, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Familial Abuse, Female Derek Hale, Genderswap, Incest, Mental Abuse, Multi, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Recovery, Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-18
Updated: 2012-11-18
Packaged: 2017-11-18 17:18:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/563502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Velocity_Owl87/pseuds/Velocity_Owl87
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek's never quite questioned how the rest of her family treats her. She doesn't know any better. Not until her brother Laurent dies and she comes back to Beacon Hills. It is her encounter with Stiles Stilinski that open her eyes and make her realize that not all touches are borne out of love and that sometimes, the seemingly awkward misfit is the one with the answers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Call Me Daughter, Not Fit To, The Picture Kept Will Remind Me

**Author's Note:**

> I was always curious as to how easily Derek accepted his uncle despite knowing that Peter had killed his sister. This, coupled with the idea of how Derek would be different as a girl and probably be treated differently in a somewhat dysfunctional and power-based structure. Her family does love her, but they also are not above manipulating her and controlling her and after the fire, she has to learn how to live out from under their shadows and be her own person. So this is her growing up and finding a possible ally and romantic partnership with the most unlikely person.
> 
> Also, there are not explicit flashbacks of past abuse when Derek was younger. Not your cup of tea or a trigger, please turn back and heed the warnings.

"I'm going back to Beacon Hills." Laurent tells her when he comes into the bathroom where she is brushing her hair. Deryn frowned at her reflection before putting the brush down and turning to look at her brother.

She was nervous regarding his sudden appearance after her shower. She had no escape routes and was only saved from total nudity by a bath towel. She wanted to panic and fight back, but all that would get her would be a scathing verbal attack and injuries that would mentally take ages to heal.

Daddy and her uncles and drilled that into her head years ago. But once in awhile, especially now that it was just her and Laurent...the old impulses tended to come back. She didn't move until she was sure that she wasn't going to do anything foolish.

Once she was sure that she wasn't going to break her training, she simply put the brush down on the counter and waited patiently for him to tell her why he had decided to go back to the scene of the Hale conflagration.

"Why now? Did uncle Peter-"

As much as it pained her to form the words, she had to force herself to ask, even though she had to fight back the memories of being aware that she had now caught her uncle's eye and being gently led to a bed with cream coloured sheets by gentle, but firm hands.

She suppressed a shudder and waited for her brother's reply while she fought to push back the memories of staring at the corner of the ceiling in his room while he murmured unintelligible things in her ear and she tried to pretend she wasn't there.

Laurent shook his head as he moved closer to his sister and reached out to tuck an errant lock of wavy black hair behind her ear. She looked irritated, but said nothing. She knew him and how he liked to play his games. Most of the time he swooped in and took what he wanted without delicacy and finesse, just twisting the threads tighter with a few chosen words that tugged on her guilt and loyalties. She knew that he wasn't aware of her role in the fire, but he had always picked up on her feelings about the fire and mercilessly tormented her with it when he was in his moods.

"He's the same. No. I found a lead. Maybe we can finally get some answers on the fire."

Laurent replied, running his hand down Deryn's hair and then cupping her cheek. She stiffened at the touch, but didn't move. He didn't like it when she moved away or stopped him from playing with her hair. She had learned that through bitter experience and despite it wearing away a bit more of her peace of mind, she remained perfectly still.

She also forced herself to remain perfectly calm when he mentioned the leads and the fire. She knew the truth, but hadn't ever told Laurent that it was a sure thing that it had been Kit Argent that had set the fire. She had never forgiven herself for falling for his lies, even though she had only been a little more than a girl. It didn't excuse anything that had happened afterward.

"When will you go?"

Laurent's eyes flashed as he moved, pushing her against the counter in the small, dingy bathroom of their cheap apartment. Her pulse quickened, but she didn't say anything. Words were as useless as blows.

She always thought that she would see it coming and have time to brace herself.

She never did.

Deryn let out a small gasp when he spun her around and grabbed a handful of her hair and shoved her over the sink so she was pressed up against the cold, spotty mirror. She closed her eyes. She didn't need to see to know what was coming.

"Tomorrow morning. Stay here and be a good girl."

Laurent replied, ripping the towel off with his free hand. She flinched as the sounds of his pants being removed reached her ears.

She only shuddered before she blocked everything out.

~*~*~*~

She didn't like the nurse with the red hair. She was too cold and too clinical and there was simply something off about her that Deryn couldn't quite put her finger on. She just knew that she would have to stay away from her. Or keep an eye on her. Whatever happened to be the right thing to do at the time. For now, Deryn settled for following her to her Uncle's room.

She didn't say anything and left Deryn once they entered the room. Deryn's hands clenched when she saw the back of the wheelchair and her uncle's body slumped in it.

Despite logically knowing that he had been in a coma since the fire...she was having a hard time bringing herself to go within reaching distance to him. She bit her lip and shifted her weight from foot to foot for about a minute before she finally managed to get enough courage up to reach out and turn the wheelchair around to face her Uncle for the first time in seven years.

She wanted to scream when she saw the ruin of his face and his empty eyes, which had always been cold no matter how much he smiled at her and ran his fingers through her hair.  But she kept silent, despite it taking most of her strength. She was silent and she forced herself to sit down on the bed and look at her uncle, because he was the one that had the answers as to why Laurent was dead and that boy Scott was now a wolf and why there were dead people, most of them on Laurent's list turning up dead.

But even though she masked her fear and practically shouted out her pleas and questions, he remained still and catatonic.

All she got was the nurse yelling at her and more troubles than she could possibly deal with once she realized Kit Argent was gunning for her. It got even worse when Scott and his friends got lured into the school by the rogue Alpha and she was down for the count and unsure if she was going to finally be put out of her misery or not.

~*~*~*~*

"You were always pretty. Now you are stunning."

Deryn's eyes flew open at the sound of her uncle's words and she scrambled backward as fast as she possibly could.

Or would have, if he hadn't gripped her ankles and pulled her forward, pinning her underneath with both his body and his red-eyed gaze.

"I waited for you. I knew you'd come after Laurent was out of the way. He never did understand to keep his hands to himself."

Peter murmured as he looked at her, freezing her with the strength of his power. He was an Alpha and was stronger than even Laurent was at his worst. She pushed back, but he was solid and unmoveable as a rock. She was frantic, though and she tried, even hitting him to get away from him.

But he was stronger. Like he always was and all he had to do was grab her hair and slam her head against the floor.

Deryn was stunned and Peter moved in, shoving his hands down her jeans and ripping them off.

She choked back either a sob or a moan, she didn't know, since Peter crushed her mouth with his as his body moved against her, his erection digging into her bare hip.

She should have never believed that she was free. Even just for a moment, she never should have grown complacent.

~*~*~*

Stiles' heart was thumping out of his ribcage at the end of the night. He honestly didn't think that the molotovs were going to work, but they had. The night was saved and Derek had become the new Alpha, even though Scott had been furious that she had been the one to kill her uncle.

He would have been too, but he had seen her face when she had come up to Peter Hale's charred, barely breathing body. Alpha or not, the molotovs had done their job thoroughly.  She moved slowly, but it wasn't the movements of a predator. No.

She wasn't one to really harm or fight unless it was necessary. He knew that most of her silences and abruptness were mechanisms to protect herself from the world out there. It had been harder on her than anyone else he knew, so he understood her need to do so. He had his own. Hers had to be more physical, since she was a born wolf and if anything he had read on wolf behaviour applied to the werewolves, then he could see why. She had had to strike back and fast. She had to make that last grand gesture or she wouldn't ever get a measure of peace. 

He didn't want to admit it, even to himself, but she moved like a victim. Like she was afraid that Peter would do something to her, despite being mortally wounded and waiting for the death blow to finish him off. She was slow and very careful. Almost too careful. It was a watchfulness that was not the usual kind of a large predator and Stiles's watched and started connecting it, bit by bit.

It was so at odds with her sullen and hard as nails demeanor that Stiles was having a hard time believing what he was seeing. But it was there. Even when she dropped heavily to her knees and spoke to Peter. It was too low for any of them to hear. It was not meant for any of them to know and it was something that he saw she needed to do desperately.

"What is she doing?!" Scott hissed as he prepared to leap in and take the kill himself, but was stopped by Stiles grabbing his arm and pulling him back.

"Ending all of this." Stiles replied, making Scott confused enough to stop and look at him, buying Derek enough time to kill Peter Hale and become the new Alpha.

Scott freaked out like Stiles knew he would and Stiles left him to it. Derek's actions disturbed him a hell of a lot more than Scott freaking out over his lost chance to regain his humanity again and besides, he needed to see Lydia and make sure that she wasn't wolfing out or dying.

He had just gotten into his jeep and slammed the door shut when he turned to look for his keys and bit back a surprised gasp at seeing a dirty and bloodied Derek sitting in his passenger seat. 

She wasn't looking at him and was simply staring straight ahead at the people milling around and the cops swarming her childhood home. 

Although he was terrified and itching to get to the hospital, he had a feeling that if he said anything or did anything other than focus on Derek, he'd never get through to her again. So he waited and tried to control the rapid beating of his heart and to wipe his damp hands on his jeans without being too obvious about it. 

"Thank you for what you did." 

Stiles blinked when he heard Derek's rough voice thanking him for holding Scott back. He hadn't really done anything much, only followed his instintcs. He was glad though, that they had been the right ones to follow all the same. 

"Don't worry about it." Stiles replied automatically, even though he wasn't sure what exactly he was saying to her at that point. 

"Where are you going?" 

She looked at him, her eyes cool and assessing as she looked at him. 

"I don't know."

"How do you feel about coffee and a shower?" Stiles blurted out, his desire to offer her some kind of security winning out over his long-standing crush on Lydia. A crush that was futile and wouldn't get him much of anything in the end.

Derek gave him a jerky nod after both of them had sat in silence while Derek contemplated his offer. 

Stiles smiled and started his jeep.

~*~*~*~*~

She was at his window again, Stiles noted as he got out of his computer chair and walked to the window. But at least she had coffee and donuts. That was a bonus. 

He didn't know when it had started that she was coming over to him on a regular basis and bringing coffee. He wasn't exactly sure what she was up to either. Everything had just...stopped after the night that they had found Kit Argent and Peter Hale dead. No one was talking about it much and mostly everyone was trying to move on. Even though there were still a few loose ends (how Jackson would glare at Scott and how he had more or less superglued himself to Lydia's hip) life was almost back to normal for all of them.

Even though Scott and Allison had to plan missions of stealth on par with an assassination to see each other and he was now second string on the lacrosse team and was starting to talk to Isaac Lahey because of that and had somehow found himself noticing and being noticed by quiet Erica Reyes...things were on par with course.

Except for the fact that Derek was coming to his window almost weekly to do nothing much except sit and drink coffee and to listen to Stiles ramble on about certain findings or things that he thought she would find interesting. 

It would have been super weird for him when he finally realized what had been going on if it hadn't been for the fact that (1) It just happened without them forcing it and (2) Derek was starting to act more like a civilized being rather than a feral and temperamental animal. He was loath to change the status quo; even though he was itching to ask her where she was spending her time, if she had a job or if she was planning to permanently move back to Beacon Hills. He suspected that if he did ask anything, the visits would stop. 

And he didn't want them to stop. He enjoyed her quiet company as much as he enjoyed Scott's loud one or Isaac's geeky one. 

He was liking her more and more and it wasn't until he saw her there again with the coffee and donuts, that he liked more than he had ever really liked Lydia. She was a constant for him now and he hadn't even been able to pinpoint the moment it had happened. He guessed it was sometime when spring started to segue into summer and his classes were winding down for the year and she no longer was wearing her jacket and was only wearing Henleys and jeans. It was that shedding of layers and the lack of distance that tipped him off that she too, felt the same about him. 

He never showed it though, but he was sure that she could tell: His heart beat just a little faster and he licked his lips more and his eyes never left the strong lines of her face, the peaks and valleys of her body and her brilliant eyes.

But he wouldn't act. Not until he got confirmation of the glimpses he had seen when Peter Hale breathed his last. 

He had done his homework and he knew to tread lightly and let her take control of the situation. They had plenty of time, as far as he was concerned and he was willing to be patient and take it easy. 

"Hey. I'll take that, thank you." Stiles greeted her as he easily grabbed the goodies from her and sat down on his bed. He had expected her to settle down on the chair by his bed like she had in the past. So when she sat down cross-legged on the bed with the coffee and donuts between them, he nearly fell off the bed and had to stop himself from doing so. He didn't think that she'd notice the extra flailing. Not when she was too busy rescuing the coffee and the treats. But she was a werewolf and had faster reflexes, so she had. 

"That obvious?"

"Would you be offended if I said slightly?"

"It doesn't matter. It's time we had this conversation. I put it off far too long after Uncl-Peter's death, I think."

He didn't miss the start and stutter at Peter's name and even though he wanted to hear it, wanted to know so she could heal...he didn't want for her to relive it all either.

"Derek-"

"Deryn."

"What?"

"My name. It's Deryn Hale and I think that if I'm going to tell you all of this, that if I can trust you enough with this, I can trust you with my real name."

Stiles swallowed hard and numbly accepted the cup of coffee being handed to him and made himself comfortable. 

"I don't know when it started, but when I understood what was happening, it was just something that had almost become routine in the house. It started with him...with Peter..."

END

 

**Author's Note:**

> Derek's female name is Welsh and she calls herself "Derek" as a move towards independence and a way to claim her own identity. Sort of loosely based in a RL situation where someone in a similar situation deliberately chose a male name as a way to assert an independent identity away from her past. Title is from Pearl Jam's "Daughter"


End file.
